Friday, December 30, 2011

Shine a Little Light

I don't like resolutions because they seem doomed to fail at the get-go. I don't like that New Year's day for many is this life-altering event that makes all of the previous years' experiences null and void because you "start fresh". To me, New Year's day is just another day ending in "Y". There is nothing special about, no magic. It doesn't come with an automatic change-everything-to-something-new button. It',BUT I do believe in changing for the better but if you're going to change why not start RIGHT NOW? Why do you have to wait until a specific day? "I want to go on a diet/start exercising/volunteering/whatever so I'm going to start that on Monday!" WHAT?!?! What's wrong with right now? If you want to change something do it now, don't let the momentum burn off over the weekend!

Change also doesn't have to be mind-blowing and huge, you can start out small and work your way toward your ultimate goal (unless you are trying to quit smoking, drugs, alcohol then cold turkey is the only way to me...)

I'm a ready for a change. I'm ready to start being a better person. To stop being so angry and to let things go like I used to be able to. I know I am never going to be able to change the past and it looks like no one else is volunteering to either, but it's going to be a long hard road. I've been angry (i.e. hurt, embarrassed, scared) for so long that I have forgotten how not to be that way. So, I have been listening to people give motivational talks and picking out little quotes that mean something to me and running with it.

People in my life love to use the phrase "Endure to the End". I hate it. I hate the thought of "enduring" sounds painful and not what I want to do. Someone else had the same view and tweaked the thought a bit to "Enjoying to the End". I know it's just one little word but I'm big on semantics and Enjoying is something I can strive for.

Another idea I am adopting for my change is something like "through small and simple things are great things accomplished"...or something like that. I'm taking it as baby steps. I don't have to take the full leap and be disappointed if I don't make it to the other side. If I have to climb down into the ravine and climb up to the other side, as long as I get there that's what matters.

My last one is a little more scriptural, "...arise and shine forth." Meaning get up and live to your full potential. Stop sitting around waiting for something to happen...MAKE things happen. People used to say I had a light about me that attracted people to me like moths to a flame. They don't say that anymore, but I would like to have it back and I know my family would like it back as well.

There are several steps I am taking to achieve my ultimate goal which is love. I made a life-altering (for the better) change almost 15 years ago simply on the basis of finding love in all its forms. In truth, over the past few years I have lost that lovin' feeling and I want it back and then some.

I'm ready for a change...who's with me?

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